The Spirits In My Head

The Sun
7 min readApr 5, 2021
“ I fight my demons everyday but they don’t fight fair.”

Quarks!

The smallest particles ever observed by humans, The quarks! It is scientifically proven that the quarks can not be separated. If we try to do so, They create more particles and expand their existence.

The big bang is considered to be the cause of the creation of the universe. The quark epoch began approximately 10 −12 seconds after the Big Bang. Ever since, The universe is expanding, with the speed greater than the speed of light. The quarks then formed the hadrons(Protons, neutrons and electrons), and as a result of almost 13.8 billion years of process, Here we are,

“Under the same sky, looking at the same stars but seeing such different things.”

The events in a human brain are often compared with the workings of the universe. For instance, There are experts who believe that the universe is nothing but a big fat brain of some creature just like us, who is playing in the backyard of its house! The stars are the neurons and they are connected in a way that they form the events that we experience.

I can read what’s going on in your heads.

I often wonder, Whoever created all this, All this for just a drop of blood? (You have heard this, haven’t you?) Hands down, Infinity war was better than the Endgame.

Haven’t you ever encountered a situation where you just hated everything around you including your own self?

If not, You will once and that’s the way life teaches us the way to live it.

These situations enter as if they are supernovas, powerful and luminous stellar explosions. The explosion that causes tremendous amount of destruction.

There are two reasons behind the supernova explosion.

Kids, You gotta remember this because it’s a backstory for

“How the spirits in your head meet the demons of your head and go one on one until one of the parties DIES.”

1.’’Last hurrah” of a dying massive star.

This happens when a star at least five times the mass of our sun goes out with a fantastic bang!

Massive stars burn huge amounts of nuclear fuel at their cores. Heat generates a tremendous amount of pressure.

When a massive star runs out of fuel, it cools off. This causes the pressure to drop. Gravity wins out, and the star suddenly collapses. Imagine something one million times the mass of Earth collapsing in 15 seconds! The collapse happens so quickly that it creates enormous shock waves that cause the outer part of the star to explode! and boom, The Supernova!

The aftereffect of this event is, if a star contains enough mass, it will turn into the eternal darkness, The Black Hole.

2.A second type of supernova can happen in systems where two stars orbit one another and at least one of those stars is an Earth-sized white dwarf. A white dwarf is what’s left after a star the size of our sun has run out of fuel.

If one white dwarf collides with another or pulls too much matter from its nearby star, the white dwarf can explode. Kaboom! Supernova again!

point to note here is,

“These spectacular events can be so bright that they outshine their entire galaxies for a few days or even months. They can be seen across the universe.”

Fascinating, isn’t it?

What if I told you, that your brain exactly works like the two events I described above. And your entire life revolves around these two events! And the End, well you already are aware!

‘I DID IT FOR ME, I LIKED IT. I WAS GOOD AT IT AND I WAS REALLY…I WAS ALIVE.’ (Baby blue by Badfinger plays in the background)

I just described the ending of the most amazing show ever made, the breaking bad.

I’ll try to keep it spoiler free.

The man did everything he could do for his family! From a chemistry teacher to a drug making criminal and the owner of millions!

One hell of a strong character! The Heisenberg!

You have heard this name, haven’t you?

Well here’s the thing, I’m no geek, I’m not insane, I’m just differently wired! Wired in a way that I always connect my surroundings with either space or science or both.

When the show ended, I couldn’t figure out what to do because I was so attached to the character!

Then it hit me that I have studied about a scientist named The Heisenberg!

WERNER HEISENBERG! And he gave us his contribution to the science as a principle of

UNCERTAINTY, THE FIRST SPIRIT!

According to one study, an average person may well meet upwards of 10,000 people physically in a lifetime.

10000 unique minds! Can you imagine!

Let your minds be free for 60 seconds, and think about the people you have met and felt that I want to be like that person/I want a life that he/she is living/ How sorted his/her life is. I’m sure there are names wandering in your heads.

Everything isn’t as it seems. There’s a backstory to every thing/person we come across in your life.

What messes with us, is our own “something that we accept as a truth without any questions or proofs.”

In short, ‘Assumptions.’

You must have assumed many things about me till this line of the article.

Let me leave behind the ‘WE’ and start with an ‘I’!

“I am a Rubik’s! A beautiful mess!” , Is what the song says! (Walk on water by Eminem!)

I’m rather an unsolvable mess. I am a rubiks for sure, a proper (3x3) one, but with 54 colors.

Nevermind,

Assume that I am meeting you for the first time.

You don’t know anything about me, I don’t know anything about you.

Now pause here for a minute and just sneak in your head a little. What do you see?

Probably a thought about me, May be hundreds of thoughts, may be nothing!

Here’s what I see,

Good?/Bad?/Past?/Future?/Right?/Wrong?/Walk?/Sit?/Left Handshake?/Right Handshake?/ Eye contact?/Confidence?/Ignorance?/Subtleness?/Real?/Fake?/Acting?/Happy?/Sad?/Alive?/Dead? . . .

Ohh wait, Alive.

What did I do here?

“Uncertainty refers to epistemic situations involving imperfect or unknown information. It applies to predictions of future events, to physical measurements that are already made, or to the unknown.”

Within a minute, I analysed the other person and started making assumptions/predictions.

At the moment I am not aware of any of the things about the person. But, Our brain is a tricky player.

It adapts thoughts very easily.

Whatever I thought in that moment, That will stay with me forever irrespective of the reality.

I am a stargazer. It amaze me how there are millions of stars shining there just for me! Most of the stars we see in the naked sky are dying stars.

“How can a dying thing give someone the hope of living!”

Neil deGrasse Tyson is his book Astrophysics for the people in a hurry’ explains the connection of ours with the stars. We are children of stars, made up of stardust! Which star?

I am not ‘certainly’ sure about it but it could be any of the millions.

People don’t leave their sparks easily is what I believe. Just like stars.But when they do,Supernova!

There are moments, then there are incidents, Some bad ones, some good ones.A star doesn’t know when it’s gonna collide with another one!A person doesn’t know when and with whom he/she’s gonna collide with.

Uncertainty!Not a good trait right?

I had a question popped up in my head a while back. Wouldn’t it be better if everyone knew when they are going to die?

Lives can be organised better. Everything will be planned. Everything will be certain.

Sounds boring? It should.

Where does this leave us?

That,

“The position and the velocity of an object cannot both be measured exactly, at the same time, even in theory.”

-Werner Heisenberg. (The principle of uncertainty)

Suppose we figured out the way to solve everything! We got all the answers to our questions. Where do we stand after that? Our existence will be nothing but a waste.

Mistakes, Confusions, Screwups! Make all this a part of yourself! They work as a fuel! So that We can shine like stars.

Learning to sit comfortably in the seat of uncertainty is challenging, but equally rewarding, because discovery is what waits just underneath the surface of that uncertainty and that gives us the chance to become fearless explorers, of our own lives.

Believe in what sir Heisenberg gave us. Both the Heisenbergs.

  1. “The position and the velocity of an object cannot both be measured exactly, at the same time, even in theory.” -Werner Heisenberg

I have felt this feeling where I felt I am kinda stuck in life! Meaning? Velocity=0 ,Position=unknown.

In real, It was Velocity = Infinite! Position = wherever I wanted to be in the entire universe!

In both the ways, Values are uncertain, But it is on me to choose between the two, And I always choose the 2nd one.

Reason? It’s the lesson from the 2nd Heisenberg!

Because I did it for me, I liked it ,I was good at it and…

I was really alive.

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And we are at the 1 minute mark after the big-bang!

The universe is going to expand, The spirits will be continued…

Stay tuned and have a great day/month/year/life!

And Don’t forget to look up once in a while, You’ll always find me up there, Mostly in a day time!

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The Sun
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Just like the sun, I guide people home! At times, destructive if I need to be, I’m always there when anyone needs me, If I fail, Consider this world dead.